Thursday, June 19, 2008

HAHA! You silly pot-bellied, moustached, dark-skinned, middle-aged, ugly males!

If you're a girl like me, you'd know that sometimes there are males who would just STAAAAAAAAAAAARRREE at you (first your face, then your butt, then your face again, then your butt) up-front, without shyness or any attempt to stop staring even when you look at them.

Sometimes, this act of male chimps are followed by that squirting sound they do with their skin-diseased mouth and unkempt moutache which hangs lowly over their open mouth (Question: How do they eat soup?). And sometimes, a snicker is shared with another male chimp, if another male chimp happens to hang around.

HATE THAT!!!!

And I can almost, aaallllllmost guarantee that the males who do this staring exercise are pot-bellied, moustached, dark-skinned, middle-aged and ugly Malay males, who often wear tired-looking striped collared t-shirts (tak hensem langsung!). Arent' they all? [Where are their wives anyway?? And don't their wives have faces and butts?]

Usually when that happens, I would just look away and pretend like nothing's happening, then quickly leave.

But today, when this Pakguard at Court [Male Chimp Exhibit A] did that squirting sound thing (What? Did he think I would suddenly fall in love and run to him and feel his biceps?!?!? What??), I just looked at him for a loooooong time with clenched teeth and muka yang marah. His face changed and I can see him blush. Haha! Besssstt! That'll teach him not to squirt and stare at my sexy butt again!

[Tapi yang ni laaaaagi best!] And when this other guy at this Mamak restaurant [Male Chimp Exhibit B] happens to stare at me and snicker at his friend whilst doing so, I took one step towards him and asked him, "APA?". He stammered (STAMMERED! Ha!) and meekly answered, "T-t-takde pape". Huh! Memang padde muko mung yang hudduh dan budduh itu!

I don't know why I have this daring streak today. I'm so proud of myself! [pats self on own back]. Girls, we should do this everytime! Seeing ugly fugly males squirm will make you happy, believe me!

Thursday, June 19, 2008



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aniz halimi
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